its been long

Wow heres something new, i.... am... legend! im now at ash's party and ya promised myself not to drink anymore but ya... what to do? life.... sometimes u cant decide.u jsut have to go. hhahah trying to control myself right now. tired? nah.. but kinda sleepy. ill stay awake. thinking whether going to school tomorrow is essential. stoinky stoink. wake up thumb. eyelids are heavy but no... not gonna see the land of slumber yet. maybe im not gonna go school tomorrow. well, many reasons. theres this beautiful girl here. hahaha k stop

power of the mind

If u feel tired while running, do think anything about the word tired. Just go run. I wish i could all the way. all the way.

If u feel pain, just think of the happy things u have in ur life. For me, right now. i just can’t carry the pain. its just to painful. I could just think of other things… but i just can’t. everything that i have done is lost. My class was talking about what if everything happening to you right now is a dream. how i wish this right now is a nightmare. Wake up! i need to wake up! I can’t be living this way man. Somebody please just pinch me to wake me up. No No, please kill me.

HOPE.its the only word in my mind right now. i hope that all this is just not true. …………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

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carelessnesstessnessary

I was a wonderful night at Johor.. Sleepover at my friends house..
After accompanying him go for a traditional massage, we went over to his place
I found out the houses there are quite affordable. Imagine two storey terrace for the cost of
a normal 4 room flat in Singapore. I think I want to buy a house there. Its a new place.
The houses was new a it looks so Singapore-ish. haha. Securities taking care of the neighborhood.
Just the kind of house I want where security, view, and comfort. However, its quite for from
shops.
We played command and conquer at his house. Yes it was fun. After playing the game we ate
some instant noodles. Usually after eating I would go for a smoke. Unfortunately, I found out
I lost the most sentimental thing to me right now. It was the lighter that I was given. *sigh*
Nothing can replace that lighter. I felt like I just ripped out my own heart. At that point of time I thought of tracing back where I have gone to that night, but it was late and Johor is not like Singapore.
If I were to be in Singapore, I would surely, by hook or by crook, go find that lighter . I wish I could go back in time and not lose that lighter. Again i *sigh*.
WASTED WASTED WASTED! Argh!

Next day,
I found out my chain for my bike was lose and it was at the point where it can drop out anytime.
We then got ourselves ready to go back to Singapore. We went to had our breakfast first before going to a bike workshop. So we went to this Malay stall. the way they serve the food was like catering kind of way.
The place the cooked dishes at the middle of the shop and as we got into the shop, we placed an order of our drinks and we went straight to take the rice. After taking the rice, we are suppose to choose the dishes... *laugh* FLIES were everywhere! And I was like... ok, lets eat. *laugh*
FLIES FLIES FLIES.... they were so fat! AS I swallow the food, I kept on thinking how flies grow *chuckles* I felt like I'm eating chunks of maggots even when I know that I'm eating the food. However, it was nice. COME TRY! Its delicious!

hmm

I swear i love the way she laugh.. the way she bites her own lips… and don’t get me started about her eyes! i mean.. it the most wonderful thing! it really2 brightens up my day. haha. RANDOM

What have i done man...

I shouldn't have come along if it ended this way..

It was a wonderful day!

People say that life is too short to sad. To me, in life if you don’t feel sad. Its boring. There are many many feelings that can be felt. Happy is good but No such thing as I’m happy always. So, its not wrong if you’re sad in life. But is not good to be sad all the time. OK basically i think we should stick to one feeling or emotion all the time.
However, there is this feeling inside of me. I’m not sure what is this feeling. But every time I’m around this certain someone, every time i think of this certain someone, I feel… I feel… Completed.  Its really2 great to have this feeling. Whenever I’m around of this certain someone , my hand is numb. i hard trouble breathing. But it feels great.My heart beat just gets faster and faster. How I love this feeling. 

…

I miss her. i made a promise to her ill study hard. but i have not been doing it. i just wish she was here. to wake me up to school.. the cook me food…. to hug and kiss  me right before i leave the house. i remember the last school result i showed her was my preliminary results and the  grades was terrible. i really2 regretted i didn’t do well there. i miss her smile. i just wish she  was here to sit beside me.  eat with me. scold me. haiz… but what to do. moving on is a good thing. but i think I've moved on without fulfilling my promise to her. i miss my mother.